Peace in Retirement

LESSONS LEARNED

2012-01-01T13:01:00.000-08:00

I have the past 365 days to ponder. I am old enough now to be grateful that I can remember events I have learned in 2011. ( I still have some memory left!) This is a good time, in the beginning of the blank slate, in a bright, fresh new beginning to think about how this time has impacted my life.

There is an Egyptian proverb that says, "Dearer than our children are the children of our children." I have been able to understand that fully in 2011. I became a grandmother. I have always loved my children, but it just can't match loving as a grandparent. It's very close in coming full circle. It's a hellva wonderful place to be.

I recognize joy and it lives in every moment. I get frustrated with my country, with my church, with the workings of the computer, and other various and sundry things. But joy just seems to out-distance them all. I like being around my growing family as we all evolve into our roles ofbeing fully human. I especially like getting to know my sons-in law, all nearly three of them. That has really been a lesson for me. I never had brothers or sons, and my Dad and my husband are my male influences. It's good they have company now.

I came to the conclusion that movement is life. If I don't move, especially as I grow older, I will literally turn to stone. So despite my utter dislike of exercise, I have learned I must make it my companion if I am to march into the wonder of 2012.

And that, dear companions along the journey, is some of where I have been. Let's get on with it. This will be a big year for me. Number 70th year is coming to meet me head on. I'm going to be waiting for it with joy. Happy New Year!

Pax Tecum

Dona Nobis Pacem - Peace on Earth

2011-11-04T07:29:00.000-07:00

We can talk about peace, wish for it, worry about it. None of that will do a thing to influence it coming into the world.....so what will make a difference?

Peace comes in baby steps. It starts deep within each of us. It's a tiny little seed that we need to identify inside of us. We need to nurture it and water it and encourage it to grow. Then when it becomes to big for our bodies, it needs to be let out into the world. PEACE in the universe comes from a little peace that is within each of us. We need to work for it, exploit it, and treasure it for ouselves, for each other, and for the entire world. Let us start, today, to spread the gift of peace.

What a beautiful world it can be!

OF BLANKETS AND BOOKS

2011-10-22T08:03:00.000-07:00

Retirement brought so many options. How to spend my time, what to do, where to go. I hustled from one interest to another, usually following my love of social justice issues. Sometimes I felt like I was meeting myself coming and going and I was running as fast as I could.

I was getting weary. Then something happened that made me pause and ponder. A joy happened in my life that stopped me in my tracks. My first grandchild Elijah was born. My focus went from a priorty of run, run, run and do, do, do to slow down, you move to fast, gotta make the morning last. I sat on my patio and pondered. I listened to what the trees and the birds were telling me. I breathed. The insight that came to me was I wanted, more then anything, to watch Elijah grow, to establish relationship with him. That meant spending as much time with him as possible. I want him to remind me of that childhood gift of just be-ing, and he is such an example of the pure joy of in the moment be-ing!

That led me to looking around, at me, at the things I enjoy doing, right where I am. I watched for signs that are always given to us, and I grabbed at them. Social justice issues in my own back-yard type of things.

I started gathering paper-back books and taking them to the local detention center. Hardly anyone does that and I filled a nitch. I remembered well my time in prison was spent hoping for books to read and coveting every one that came into my hands. Yesterday,my husband Tom and I delivered book number 3,000 to the jail. The inmates have little to do to occupy their time. Having books to read helps.

And then there are the blankets. When I was working in public health I started a blanket drive. I would walk along the river and give blankets to homeless folks living outside in the cold Wyoming winters. Somehow people just started giving me blankets, and I distribute them to agencies and others who will see that they get to people who need them. And I still walk the river.

And so I am doing my little piece in my home-town to make things a little easier for some folks.

I still think big justice issues are imporant and I will continue working on them. I'm just not running as fast these days. Sometimes great revelations come in small packages. Thank you Elijah for coming into my life!

Pax Tecum

FROM THEN TO NOW

2011-08-26T07:51:00.000-07:00

I haven't written since March 17th. I love to write, but my blog would never know it. I do have excuses, and I think good ones. And here they are......

I did indeed become a Grandmother. It was, without doubt, one of the most joyous events in my life. His name is Elijah and he is five months old. Full of smiles and wonder and love. My sister gave me a wall hanging that says, "I used to think I was too old to fall in love again, but then I became a Grandma." I thought I had all the joy my life would allow when I had my children. I have learned that there is more, and I am immensely grateful to be able to experience the "icing on the cake"! My husband and I relish the role of grandparents.

The summer months have flown by, as always. We have camped out and breathed in the beauty of Wyoming. I have re-connected with family and extended family in gatherings around the area. And I am pursuing areas of interest that have long been on the back burner of my brain. Things like starting a children's book, and doing research on TB Camps of the 1920's in the mountains of Wyoming. Social justice issues continue to interest me.

Spiritually I am trying to assimulate a balance between action and contemplation, and feel inadequate in both areas most of the time. The poor continue to haunt me, and I look for signs to determine my path of solidarity to them and with them.

I love this prayer of St. Teresa of Avila:

Christ has no body now but yours
no hands but yours,
no feet but yours.
Yours are the eyes through which
Christ's compassion must look out on the world.
Yours are the feet with which
He is to go about doing good.
Yours are the hands with which
He is to bless us now.

Let us continue trying.....

Pax Tecum

WAITING.....

2011-03-17T08:23:00.000-07:00

Patience has always been the least of my redemptive features. I can still recall how it felt on Christmas Eve when I was just a kid living on Wy Ave in Buffalo, Wy. It was agony to wait for Christmas morning to open gifts. This lack of patience has followed me through my life.

Three years ago when I was sentenced to prison for civil disobedience, I had to wait two months before I finally walked through that steel door. Believe me, waiting those two months just added to the time I spent behind bars. Last year at this time I was waiting to go to Haiti to work at a clinic. I knew a month ahead I would be going, however it took time to organize the team, and so I waited.

These recent examples of wait happened in March. Here it is, March again and I am waiting again. This time, perhaps for the most joyous, anticipated reason of all for waiting.....the birth of my first grand-child! This wait resembles the other waits. There is some anxiety, some reflection, some longing that my reality was not in a holding pattern but in full motion. ON WITH IT! But this time the wait is not about me. It's about an angel about to be. A new spirit deciding when to enter this world. This child of God who will change our view of life forever.

It takes my breath away to think about it. Perhaps this March wait time will be the one to teach me about the gift of waiting, in fact, I think it already has....

Pax Tecum

HELLO DARKNESS, MY OLD FRIEND

2010-12-14T07:46:00.000-08:00

I have never been afraid of the dark. I've felt that it offers me a protective covering, a kind of warm fleece snuggie. And I have always been in love with stars, and they just don't happen without dark. I find this time of year interesting. As we march to the shortest day of the year, it always brings out the hope and the anticipation of that first Christmas night.

I'm always ready for the season of Advent. It slows me down, it allows me to get ready. Not for the crazy holiday push to acquire, but for the fullfillment of a longing, a yearning for the union of Emmanual with us, and the knowledge that since He came and lived among us, we have the tools to continue the journey.

This year, the coming of the Babe has an even deeper meaning as we wait for another babe to be born. This one will arrive in March, also with great anticipation. As we prepare for the birth of both babies, I can't help but marvel at the goodness of God. He showered the night with stars to announce the arrival of His gift to us. And He has filled the night with stars since then to remind us that great gift continues down through time and appears continually in all births.

I welcome short days and long nights. The time for Jesus and hope and renewal is here. Then it's on to March! And the mystery of a new birth that will allow me to be GRAMMA for the first time! Merry Christmas!

Pax Tecum

HAITI

2010-04-22T07:46:00.000-07:00

This blog is about my journey to Haiti. It's going to be a glimpse of an experience that touched my life like almost no other has. So let us begin....

Some time ago I had picked Haiti as the place I would like to visit. Perhaps because it is the poorest country in our hemisphere and I wanted to get up close to poverty, to look it in the face and to feel its reality. After the earthquake on Jan.12th, I kept waiting for an opportunity, and one came knocking on my own back-door. My own parish church's response to the earthquake was a relief effort called the Wyoming Haiti Relief. It would coordinate medical teams to travel to Haiti to assist in the recovery. It was a no brainer, I was in the right place at the right time. No excuses. I volunteered. It took awhile. I couldn't go right away and when I was ready, the team wasn't formed. But I finally made it as a member of Team 5 which would include 3 men, working on affordable housing, and 2 nurses.

Our location was Matthew 25 House in Port-au-Prince. Before the earthquake it was a hospitality house for travelers coming in and going out of Haiti. It currently houses relief workers from all over the world who are in transit to all parts of Haiti. Our team was assigned to work at Matthew 25's adjacent tent city of 1800 Haitians living on three acres. The director of Matthew 25 is Sister Mary Finnick, a long time resident of Haiti.

Our first day in Haiti was Thurs., March 25th, day 62 after the eaethquake. It was hot, humid, third world, destroyed, and utterly chaotic. Sister Mary met us at the airport, holding a sign that said "Wyoming". She put us into her SUV and attacked the dirt streets of Port-au-Prince. No street lights, no right of ways, just sheer guts. And she seemed to be the guttsiest. I think the Holy Spirit was sitting on top of the SUV, holding on for dear life! That was my introduction to my two week stay in Haiti.

It was personally challenging for me. Living and sleeping in a tent for 14 days, working in an outdoor clinic all day, everyday, with temps in the 90's and humidity in the 60's and 70's put this old girl through the wringer. I sweat constantly, lost my appetite, lost 15 pounds, and desperately missed the winds of the High Plains!

I spent Holy Week with a new appreciation for bodily suffering. Some days I wondered if I would make it.

But there was another side of it. That side was EASTER. It was exhilarating! I met people from all over the world, coming to Haiti to help. They worked hard, long days trying to make life better for the Haitian people. I was amazed at the volunteers who had been there several times, and came back and came back again.

But most of all, the Haitian people were a revelation. They had nothing. No running water, little food, living in small crowded tents inches from each other. I never saw a child with a toy. But their attitude and spirit were buoyant and joyous and ever hopeful. It was a true pleasure to be among them. My friend, Pat, the other nurse and I would marvel at how the Haitians always looked clean with clean clothes. We looked the exact opposite. We couldn't figure it out.

I attended the Easter Vigil Mass with Sister Mary. The Church had been damaged, so it was held outside. We had to carry our chairs to sit. There was no electricity so we held candles for light. We had no music but sang without it. The priest gave his homily in French, but at one point looked at the relief workers and said in English, "You are here. This is your destiny. This is the Resurrection." And I did indeed understand what he meant.

I learned that poverty does not mean misery. Poverty makes the way easier to the true meaning of life. Simple joy, family, hope. It's indeed a different reality, maybe a great gift, that we can glimpse at special moments in our lives.

Haiti's gift to me was a feeling of solidarity with them. I will value that for the rest of my life.

PAX TECUM

30 YEARS AGO TONIGHT

2009-12-21T20:19:00.000-08:00

I can remember it like it was yesterday. I was wrapping Christmas presents in the family room downstairs in my home. The gift was a golf practice game for my husband. That's when the telephone call came that was to change my family's life forever. My Dad was in the emergency room at the hospital. Get there as soon as you can. My Dad? He's at a Christmas party with his co-workers. Mom went with him. And that's the last normal thing I knew. It wasn't the same after that.

Dad had collapsed while dancing a waltz at that Christmas party. He had finished a dance with Mom and one of the other women asked him to dance. I always liked to watch him dance. He was so graceful, and he loved to dance.

Dad had a massive heart attack and died that Christmas party night on the Winter Solstice, Dec.21,1979. I was 37 years old with a husband and three little girls. I needed my Dad and wasn't ready for him to fly off into the night, leaving us all bewildered below.

As I left the ER that night, on my way home to a new reality, I remember looking up at the stars and thinking of Shakespeare's Romero saying "And, when he shall die, take him and cut him out in little stars. He will make the face of heaven so fair that all the world will fall in love with night and pay no heed to the garish sun."

Thr lessons I learned from him were many.He was always there for us.He worked harder then a man should have to work. He was proud, he loved Wyoming,and had the best sense of humor. He was comfortable around people and could shoot the shit with the best of them. One day I stopped to have lunch with Mom and Dad. I was stressed out over a job I had as a nurse. There was no job description and I had to develop it as I went. It was a big chance and a big challenge and needed constant interpretation to everyone. I was sick and tired of it and wanted to quit. As I talked to my parents about it, Dad said I should quit. He questioned the reasons the job was given to me, didn't they know it would be too hard? On the way back to work, I got mad. They were not going to beat me, I would show them I would do just fine, and I would do what I knew deep down I could do. Dad's reverse psychology really worked on me that day!

We just didn't have him long enough. There's lots I would like to talk to him about and tell him. I do that now, but his twinkling blue eyes are not looking at me, and his crazy faces are only a memory. I know life is a journey to death. He made his journey a legacy for us. I pray I can do half the job for my children that he did for us.

Good-night, Herm. Sleep well. Tomorrow is another dancing day, and you and Mom have the universe to waltz through. Don't stumble on the stars.

Pax Tecum

ILLUSIONS, PART 2

2009-11-03T10:01:00.000-08:00

There are 450 Minutemen III missles deployed in the United States. That breaks down to 49 in Colorado, 82 in Nebraska and 19 in Wyoming all controlled from Warren AFB in Cheyenne.
There are 150 in North Dakota controlled from Minot AFB, ND. Finally there are 150 in Montana controlled from Malmstrom AFB in Great Falls

Each missle has one nuclear bomb on board. The size of the bomb is estimated to be between 12 and 18 times the size of the Hiroshima bomb. They are on constant alert with bomb crews deployed in groups, which are assigned 10 bomb sites per launch control center.

Vigil at Nuclear Silo N8, August 15, 2009. The directions from Cheyenne: Go south on route 85 to Ault. Take route 14 east for about 35 miles to road 113, you can see the silo from the road.
East of I-25 in Colorado, it looks alot like Nebraska, rolling farm land with miles of corn and cows. The sky is very blue.

We, who are gathered here, pray today with all the world citizens that peace may be in every heart, in every home, in every nation.

I didn't think it would have the impact it did. A steel lid on a concrete pad with a fence around it, looked on by a camera and a satellite dish in the middle of Colorado farm country. Every bit as powerful as 20,000 people at the gates of Fort Benning. Why? It was the stillness that caught my attention. The air, the site, and very nearly my heart....all still. It was all over me. Comprehension of chaos evoked a sense of stillness to the extent I almost didn't breathe.

What was that? If you get the chance, visit a Silo up close. Chances are your reaction will be similar. The stillness is deafening.

Pax Tecum

ILLUSIONS, PART 1

2009-08-18T13:38:00.000-07:00

The dog days of summer. August is here. The road trip from Wyoming to New Mexico was relaxing and scenic and summer. The horizons smiled at us. Santa Fe was bustling and vibrant and fun. Lots of people and history and art.

We were on our way to Los Alamos, which has a history unto itself. Our focus was the Los Alamos National Laboratory. It has 13,000 employees and a yearly budget of 2.2 billion dollars. It's main purpose has always been the classified work for the design of nuclear weapons.

We, along with other Pax Christi members traveled from many states and countries to participate at a vigil to remember what happened from there 64 years ago. As we walked in silent, reflective, non-violent procession to be witnesses to that event, I thought it ironic we crossed a street called Oppenheimer Drive, named for J. Robert Oppenheimer, the first director of that famous Manhattan Project.

Los Alamos is high country, over 7,000 feet. It has breath-taking mountain scenery. Its canyons and mesas cry out beauty and peace. It is one of the wealthiest communities in the United States. Hundreds of PHD's do not come cheap. As I sat among others at the lab site, in silent prayer and reflection, my mind reached back and pulled 64 years ago close.

"The bomb exploded with a blinding flash in the sky...a great rush of air...a loud rumble of noise...a great cloud of dust and smoke...a pall of darkness...fires sprang up...an immense fire store...." (from the U.S. Gov't report on Hiroshima)

Monday, August 6, 1945....Hiroshima, Japan
Thursday, August 9, 1945...Nagasaki, Japan

These are, to date, the only attacks with nuclear weapons in the history of warfare.

The victims: Two cities in Japan
The perpetrators: The United States of America

Killed: 140,000 people in Hiroshima
80,000 people in Nagasaki

One half of these deaths occurred on the days of the bombings. 15-20% died from injuries of the combined effects of flash burns, trauma, and radiation burns, compounded by illness, malnutrition, and radiation sickness. Since then more have died from leukemia and cancers attributed to exposure to radiation released by the bombs.

MOST OF THE DEAD WERE CIVILIANS.
THE RESIDENTS OF HIROSHIMA WERE GIVEN NO NOTICE OF THE ATOMIC BOMB.

Beautiful Los Alamos. Why am I crying??

Pax Tecum

MY THIRD CHAPTER

2009-08-06T08:44:00.000-07:00

I just completed reading a remarkable book entitled "The Third Chapter...Passion, Risk, and Adventure in the 25 Years After 50" by Sara Lawrence-Lightfoot. She writes that the third chapter is a stage of life when the traditional norms, rules, and rituals of our careers seem less restrictive; a time to embrace new challenges and to search for a greater meaning in our lives.

This book spoke to me. Since my retirement 2 years ago I have been on a new path, that I haven't been able to articulate clearly, to myself or to others. For over 30 years I worked diligently in the public health sector being an advocate for people who had no power.
Along the way I was fortunate to be in the arena with some large social justice issues. I worked with the farm-workers in Central California, with immigrants fighting tuberculosis in Texas, and elderly people in Wyoming who had to choose between buying food and medications. I did what I could, along with working long hours and raising a family.

My life changed dramatically and quickly when I retired. All of a sudden I had the time and the passion to devote to direct action activities so near and dear my heart. With the support from my terrific family, I entered into justice issues, I had never had the time to explore before.

And I jumped in with both feet, energized by a passion too long ignored in a journey that led to this time in my life. I am no longer afraid of speaking out, or of standing up, or of questioning the powers that be. My place is to be in that march to make the world more just, more peaceful and more loving. There is a voice to my heart and it speaks louder every day.

And so I am arrested and imprisoned for my beliefs. What a gift that was! And I continue on. Know that in my writings I am talking to myself as much as I am talking to you. I wll write more of my journey, most recently a trip to New Mexico in recognition of the anniversary of the atomic attack on Hiroshima and Nagasaki. With joy I invite you to travel with me, but wear good shoes and carry some water. The trail can get bumpy and hot!

Pax Tecum

MOM'S MOJO

2009-05-18T08:35:00.000-07:00

One year ago, on May 13th, Mom died. The year went quickly, as I knew it would, bringing us back to that pivotal day, that the world we had known with Mom in it, ended.

I knew in my heart that remembering her especially on that day would not be enough, so I branded the week that was, Mom's Mojo week. I wanted to honor the things that were important to her, and fun for her. And it turned out that her spirit was indeed along for the ride!

It started with Mother's Day on May 10th. I went to Mass and prayed, along with everyone else for my Mom and Moms everywhere. The impact they make on the lives of their children is priceless.

Then on to Tuesday. My sister, Judy and I, with the help of Jolyn (another sister) gathered up flowers and plants and made the trip to Buffalo. It's about two hours north of Casper. We visited her and Dad's grave-sites, and many other relatives resting in the Willow Grove Cemetery. We spent time walking in that beautiful, peaceful place among the trees and listened to the breeze as we looked to the Big Horn Mountains. It is a friendly place, and very familiar. The spirits of the history of our loved ones reside there, and they were happy we came. From there we visited relatives in the area, people who share our history and that we see all to seldom. Our bond of family lives in us all. From there we visited sites remembered in a long ago childhood, the library, now a museum, but still smelling of books read and listened to long ago. And our elementary school, where we began our journey to the outside world. It was a day treasured.

Wednesday was difficult. I worked in the afternoon but was distracted. I kept remembering the Feast of Our lady of Fatima a year ago, and how I had prayed for Mary to take Mom home on that day. It pained me to know she honored that wish.

Thursday, the early morning Mass was said for Mom. It was said in Mom's favorite Church, where she had attended most of her life, and the Church where her funeral Mass was conducted. And so we came full circle.

Friday came and it was time for fun. She loved to travel to Deadwood to gamble at the slots. Tom, Judy, and I went to Deadwood for the week-end and walked to all the places Mom had so much fun going to. It was a fun trip, and as we listened to the bells and the whistles and saw the lights flashing and heard the excited banter, I felt Mom's presence and heard her laugh and saw the twinkle in her eye. We did indeed inhale her mojo, and we all won little bits of money, and even found money on the floor, not one of us but all of us! How do you explain that?

And so that was the week that was. Gone but still here,never to be forgotten, loved forever, in my heart always!

Pax Tecum

2009-04-03T12:07:00.000-07:00

A YEAR LATER

This very hour, this very day one year ago, I was kissing my husband good-bye, fighting tears, and going through the steel doors of the Federal Detention Center at SeaTac near Seattle. It was one of the most traumatic moments of my life. Every thing was stripped from me. I got to keep my glasses, and that was it. But I did still have my body and my mind and my spirit. And I knew I had a choice. I could choose how I would live in that environment and I could choose what I wanted to learn and bring out of that experience.

What a difference a year makes. It's Spring again in Wyoming, with all the heavy wet snows and the budding trees and the tiny green leaves of daffodils waiting patiently for their blanket of whiteness to melt. And I get to look back and reflect on a year unlike any other.

Such joy and such sorrow and such growth. How could I know that when I said good-bye to my Mom sitting in her blue recliner that it would be the last time I would ever see her in her home? The day I was released from jail, she went into the hospital and died 13 days later. And how much joy was felt when almost a year later, my oldest daughter married her love.

But the growth has not been without the pain. I am not comfortable now. I question more, have less patience with the wrongs in the world and wonder, more then ever, where my place in all of it should be.

I continue to try and read the signs. I have a new job, working a few hours a week at a clinic for the homeless. I consider the clients fellow pilgrims, who add joy and hope to my world. I write to prisoners and gather books for them and try not to forget that one out of every 31 adults in this country is in jail. And I returned to Georgia last Fall to continue my commitment to close down the School of the Americas. And I was witness to six new people who came forth and non-violently stood up and challenged injustice. They are currently serving their time in prison.

I am optimistic about this country of ours. I feel that justice and peace are more possible now then ever, and I am confident that this economic crisis will improve. As my 67th birthday approaches, I thank the Spirit for allowing my journey to include a side trip behind those steel doors. There are all kinds of gifts. Who would know that one of the greatest gifts was given to me one year ago this very hour when the doors clanged shut, leaving me locked inside.

Pax Tecum

Pictures from Belize...

2009-02-01T13:51:00.001-08:00

Yu Betta Belize It!

2009-01-28T08:13:00.000-08:00

Winter always lasts too long under the blue sky of Wyoming. This January we decided to take a time out and leave the snow and wind and biting cold behind us. We drove to Denver, left our winter coats in the car, got on the plane and flew to Belize.

Why? Because it was warm, and was some place we had never been before. We were ready for a new adventure and Central America and the Caribbean called us to their warm shores and their laid back life-style. We didn't expect to fall in love, but Belize took us by surprise, and fall in love we did.

It inspired us to relax, invited us to explore, and exposed us to a gentle, kind people. We saw shapes, colors, and creatures near the hemisphere's largest barrier reef. We walked among prehistoric tree ferns and ancient religious plazas in Maya archaeological sites.
We saw birds, insects, cats, and critters in Belize's vast areas of forests.

We met many of the 290,000 Belizeans coming from a multitude of Creolized cultures. The English-speaking, affable citizens make things easy, its location to the United States makes it close, and its wealth of creative accommodations, and active list of tours makes it a natural place to visit.

It gave us a different perspective, took us to a different place and a different time in our lives.

My favorite place ? There were many. Certainly the wildlife boat trip on the New River to the Mayan temples at Lamanai , and the taxi boat rides to the neighboring Cayes basking in the bluest waters I have ever seen are among the high-lights. Of course down-town Belize City with the markets and the bustle and the easy going people with the sights and sounds, of the drumming on the city street corners, and the clothes hanging out to dry from porches, and windows and door-ways and the bright colors of the houses including purples and oranges and yellows and all shades of blue, but no dark colors, all filled my senses and delighted my being.

There was poverty. Lots of it. People living simply, but with an attitude of gratitude and sharing. It humbled me to be among them.

And so on this end of January day, with snow and wind and below freezing temps outside, I sit inside warmed not only by the fire in the fireplace,but by that inner Belizean glow that will substain me in the coldest of days.
Yu Betta Belize it!!!!!

Pax Tecum

GOODBYE 2008

2008-12-31T20:36:00.000-08:00

New Year's Eve has always been a reflective time for me. I look back at the year with amazement. Did all that really happen? And I survived it!

My life has really been impacted by the events of this year. The first and most significant was the death of my Mom. She was 88 years old and I am 66. I still wonder how I can get along without her. She was the wise woman who knew the answers, and it was always comforting to know she was close by. She's even closer now, living in my heart. But it's a change that's difficult to get used to. I am trying. I know she would want me to. Thanks Mom for being a presence in my life that was always bigger then life. I am happy the cosmos is now your playground. Tell Dad Hello and all the rest of the family who waited patiently for you.

For the first time in my life I went to trial and to prison for standing up for something I am passionate about: Justice. I'm happy I had the guts to follow my heart and do what was my right thing to do.

Two of my daughters became engaged and two of my sisters moved back home, and another sister retired. Older age brings transitions, and change seems to be in the air. My family remains my center. They help to define me. What blessings and gifts I have been given. I am thankful for each and every day.

I always look forward to the New Year. Maybe more this year. I have great hopes that this country that I love so much will become new again.

From me to you, Pax Tecum and HAPPY NEW YEAR!

AFTER CHRISTMAS

2008-12-29T07:24:00.000-08:00

Christmas is a hard act to follow. For those of us who strive for peace in our lives, it is an intense, fleeting glimpse of the promise of the Christ Child. Of how it could be, of how simple it would be to have it. Is loving each other really that difficult? It is, indeed, a dangerous time. Thoughts of peace should never go beyond that brief Christmas time. A time out at the end of a chaotic year. Peace is good, war is bad. Right?

Four days after Christmas. The war gods are rumbling. Trying to get rid of that yearly pesky peace stuff. Pakistan and India gearing up, Israel and Humas already engaged, not in the peace of the Child who was born on their soil, but intent on shedding blood all over His legacy. Not even to mention Afghanistan, where 14 young students, barely older then that babe in the manger, were blown to bits on their way to school.

I sit in my warm comfortable home and wonder what it would take for you and me to influence that process, to tip the scale in favor of peace instead of war. It seems to be a daunting task. What can little people do to stand up to the power of corporations, greed, and money. War is big business and that's survival, and that over-rides peace anyday.

But, wait a minute. That little spark of hope, put there by the birth of that babe flickers in all of us. We must protect it and nurture it and talk about it loud and clear. That in itself will lead to more action, and someday good men will win. We learned recently that YES we can. If we can elect an African American President of the United States, why not decide to have a peaceful world?

Welcome to the New Year. Let us decide that it will be more peaceful for the babe in all of us.

Pax Tecum

THE TIMES, THEY ARE A CHANG'IN

2008-11-05T09:47:00.000-08:00

I remember when John F. Kennedy was elected President. I was too young to vote, but the feelings of unity and pride of country bore themselves into my soul. And those feelings stayed there and substained me for decades. But for many years now, they have stayed silent and dorment, while I have been lethargic and deeply concerned about the path our country has been on.

And then last night happened. A night I was nervous about because I wanted it to much, because during this amazing campaign, those long ago dimmed hopes exploded to life and hope became real again. I cried when Barack Obama won the election. I was not the only one, to be certain, but if he could awaken the spark of unity and honor and pride of country in this old woman, what did he do for the future of us all?

I remember the Civil Rights Movement, when the dignity of man was largely ignored. When Martin Luther King, Jr. shared his dream of being "free at last" Well, guess what...last night we all gave each other a gift. We all became free at last! We chose to be the deciders of our own destiny. No more fear or inertia or indifference. We will, with Barack Obama's help, follow a different path, work on a new understanding, and become a proud American citizen of the world.

I have come full circle and I am once again, ready to embark on a new adventure.

Pax Tecum

TURNING THE CORNER

2008-08-25T11:10:00.000-07:00

I notice there is a little coolness in the air. It's just a hint but nature is telling me, in a gentle way, that Fall looms ahead.

The summer went fast. Jail time and my Mom's death threw me into June. It brought a large, always fun family reunion in Northern Wyoming, the birth place of the Kraen and Bates families. We had smiles from Heaven all during that time.

July was a busy home month and August brought busy big-time. With family and extended family we attended my nephew's wedding at Lake Tahoe. Spending time there and in the Reno area was fun and renewed memories of how neat that area is. The wedding on the beach was beautiful as was the yacht trip on Lake Tahoe to Emerald Cove. How gorgeous that was! Good company and good times, especially joyful after the sadness we experienced in May.

Last week I went to Denver as a volunteer for the Democratic National Convention in partnership with the Denver 2008 Convention Host Committee. I was assigned to the American Presidential Experience, a nonpartisan tribute to Presidential History. It was located in a 40,000 square foot tent in the parking lot at Invesco Field at Mile High. What fun that was! The exhibit included such things as a replica of the West Wing, Air Force One, famous chairs used by presidents, JFK and Jackie Kennedy items, first ladies gowns, and one of the remaining original copies of the Declaration of Independence.

The biggewst thrill was meeting the other volunteers. So many came from all over the country to be there. Committed, articulate volunteers who wanted to be a part of the process. The three days were wonderful. My husband and I re- acquainted ourselves with Denver, and spent some quality time in Boulder with my daughter and her fiance. Now I can spend this Convention week holed up in my house watching the events in Denver in TV, knowing I helped out a little bit.

Pax Tecum

AFTERMATH

2008-06-30T07:40:00.000-07:00

I had mixed feelilngs about leaving jail. My spirit was re-energized there, for reasons not even clear to me. Coming home created new challenges. My mother was admitted to the hospital the day I was released from SeaTac and died thirteen days later. Processing these two major events in my life has been rough, but I'm working my way through it, and making notes of the signs floating my way.

I will help facililate an educational module on prison reform in the Fall and with the cooperation of the Director of the local detention center, will start collecting books (paper back only) for the inmates. I correspond and support lady inmates at SeaTac and they continue to minister to me from behind those locked steel doors.

I communicate with many of the SOAW 11. They, like me, are trying to understand the changes we all feel inside from spending time in jail. I eagerly await to re-unite with them during the November Vigil in Columbus, at the next SOAW rally. Did we make a difference by crossing the line?? The answer has always been YES. Visable changes in ourselves and invisible changes we don't even fathom. There is movement in the legislative process for defunding SOA/WHINSEC. Demanding transparency has cleared the House and it goes on to the Senate. Being a tiny puzzle piece in that big picture soothes my heart.

For you out there in cyber-space: Extend yourselves in one small way. Pull out of the "I" realm into the "WE" realm, and act on it. The result will be clarity for you and a goodness for the world.

Pax Tecum

IMPRESSIONS

2008-05-18T09:15:00.000-07:00

I thought I would be jubilant when I walked out of SeaTac Federal Detention Center. I was, and yet---a little bit of me stayed in Unit EA, cell #59-- not with the life styles or the control or the sensory deprivation. It stayed with the women inmates I met and got to know during my thirty days of incarceration.

Their stories were bleak. Abuse, neglect, abandonment, too trusting of men and not enough trust in themselves. Making wrong choices, usually not once but many times. In and out of jails, violating probation. Being seperated from their children and elderly parents for months and years at a time.

How dare I go among them for a reason difficult for them to understand, with an unbelievable support system and enough money to call home as often as I liked, and only staying for 30 days. But they included me in their lives, shared with me their stories and hopes and dreams of a life free.

I invaded their world for 30 days--with their permission and their generosity. I was honored and overwhelmed. Release came with a cost, because they came with me. They taught me that dignity is taken from them only if they let it be taken, and it was protected at all costs.

It was a jail--after all and there were constant controls--lock downs and counts and strict rules and DON'T CROSS THE LINE, or you will end up in the SHU, the jail within the jail. The food was not good. Starches and fat. I never got used to it. Sometimes I only picked at it and took a few bites and left the rest. Only white bread, and limited fruit and milk. Not much taste to anything. Coffee was a gray color. I took the first sip and didn't drink anymore for the rest of my stay.

The bunks were metal frames with thin mattresses. It was like sleeping on concrete. We had two thin blankets. I slept in my clothes, or sweats, with socks and sometimes my jacket on to keep warm.

It was a liberating experience. I learned I could do it and survive. I learned I could live without television, and radio and coffee and all the other stimulants thrown to us by a consumer crazy society. And it created a serenity inside of me. And my insides are rearranged, and I will never be quite the same again.

Pax Tecum

INSIDE

2008-04-14T18:47:00.000-07:00

I reported to Sea-Tac Federal Detention Center on Thursday, April 3rd. My husband and I flew to Seattle the day before. We were able to have a restful night and a beautiful, warm, sunny morning visiting a park and small lake. I just sat there and enjoyed being outside. That indeed was a gift.

The most difficult part of jail is getting in. Processing took a long time and getting to my unit late was tiring and somewhat frightening. I've been in a week already and my time is finally settling into a routine. It is a confusing system to get used to. My unit consists of 60 cells with about 110 women.

The cells surround a large dayroom. TV's, a walking track and exercise equipment are available. But it is a jail. We have counts and shut-downs. Our lives are controlled. We are told when to eat and sleep. There are few options. We can't go outside. My slit of a window faces another building so I can't see but a tiny patch of the sky. Some women stay here three years. I don't know how they tolerate not going outside.

In spite of this restrictive environment, the women here have forged a community of people who help each other, work, have fun and welcome new inmates. I marvel at their ability to focus on the now. Few of them dwell on the past or the future. They don't know for sure where they will end up or how long they will stay.

I have only three weeks left. It's been an interesting journey. Will I be changed when I get out? You bet. Pax Tecum

This post was received with a letter from my mom today. I promised to update her blog and help spread the word. My dad spoke with her since the letter was written and said that the other inmates are calling her "Grandma". There is a certain irony that she had to go to prison to be called that.
Tara Anderson

FINALLY

2008-03-31T09:46:00.000-07:00

The waiting has been almost unbearable at times. Nov. 18, 2007 seems so long ago. I crossed the line at Fort Benning in protest of SOA/WHINSEC on that date. The trial was in Columbus on Jan. 28th, and the order to report finally arrived.

I am on my way to Seattle on Wed. April 2nd, and will report to SeaTac Detention Center on Thurs. April 3rd for a 30 day stay. I am so happy about entering into the final phase of this non-violent action. I know my reality will change, I think prison does that to you, but I will also feel good about what I set out to accomplish. To take a stand, to bring SOA/WHINSEC more in the open and to continue to try to make this school HISTORY. We can do it, and we will do it.

I am including my address in prison. I will enjoy hearing from anyone that wants to write. I will try to answer all the mail I receive. Until my release, I will say Happy Trails. My daughter, Tara, will update this blog while I am in prison.

Take care, all of you out there, and remember that we all can make a difference. Just don't stop trying. Pax Tecum.

Joan Anderson, #93649-020
FDC SeaTac
Federal Detention Center
PO Box 13900
Seattle, Washington 98198

MARCH RELIEF

2008-03-06T08:29:00.000-08:00

February was a very long month, and there was a very large elephant in the room. But on Monday, March 3, the telephone call from the Feds finally arrived.

I am to report on April 3 at the Sea-Tac Federal Detention Center in Seattle. I felt instant relief. Now I have a date and a place to complete the last phase of my action for justice. I will be in for 30 days. I will spend Easter on the outside and march toward Pentacost on the inside. I plan to participate in the SOAW fast for 3 days in late April and I would encourage you to do likewises. You can get more information from the SOAW website (SOAW.org).

Thanks to all for your interest, and prayers. I will be remembering you in all my prayers in prison. I ask that you remember the poor and powerless in Latin America and to encourage your U.S. Reps to stop the funding for WHINSEC. The Establishment never moves unless they are pushed by the people. And the people are us!

Pax Tecum

TRIAL STATEMENT... JANUARY 28,2008

2008-02-03T10:12:00.000-08:00

TRIAL STATEMENT by Joan C. Anderson January 28, 2008
My name is Joan Anderson. My husband is Tom, and we have three daughters, Tara, Katie, and Lisa. I was born and raised in Wyoming. I can go a few miles from my home, turn around in a circle and see the horizon where the land meets the sky in every direction. As a native Wyomingite, space and freedom are very important to me. I love this country.
I’ve had a difficult time writing this statement. The reasons for committing an act of nonviolent civil disobedience that becomes an action for justice are highly personal. The reasons lie deep within my heart and in my gut. It’s greatly about acknowledging the Spirit of God within me.
I have been a public health nurse for 40 years. I am well aware of my rights and responsibilities. I plead GUILTY to “crossing the line” and trespassing on the grounds of Fort Benning on Nov. 18th. It is one of the most important things I have ever done in my life. I have never been arrested before nor do I plan on being arrested again. I will honor the Ban and Bar Letter. I am a care-giver for my 88 year old mother and both she and I would prefer that I get probation.
I join the ranks of those who have been here before me and those who are with me today to denounce the well documented atrocities performed by graduates of the SOA/WHINSEC. I am concerned that my taxes and your taxes are keeping this school operational. IT’S TIME TO STOP THE FUNDING NOW! Martin Luther King, Jr. stated that an individual is expressing the very highest respect for law if he breaks a law that conscience tells him is unjust and accepts the penalty in order to arouse the conscience of the community over its injustice.I come from the same city as the Vice President of the United States. In fact, I was a year behind him in high school. And also living there is a former United States Ambassador to Guatemala in the late 80’s and early 90’s. I find it interesting that they have never been in a courtroom like the one I am in today to answer for the tortures that happened during their watch. I crossed the line nonviolently opposing that torture and I face prison time. And so injustice continues. I am proud and honored to stand in solidarity with the poor and powerless in Latin America who have been and are victims of this flawed U.S. foreign policy. I pray that one day human rights will become a priority in this country. GOD BLESS US

ON TRIAL

2008-02-03T08:59:00.000-08:00

It was 71 days from November 18th to January 28th. Some days it was much longer and other days the time seemed to fly by. But it finally came, as most things do. It was worth waiting for, despite moments of extreme anxiety and down right fear.

I went on trial in federal district court in Columbus, Georgia along with ten other defendants, charged with trespassing onto the grounds of a military installation. The site was Fort Benning, the purpose: to non-violently oppose the School of the Americas, also known as the Western Institute of Security Cooperation. It has a well documented record of training Latin American security personnel in methods of torture. They, in turn, return to their respective countries and many of them make the school proud. We were all charged with a misdemeanor.

We knew, from past experiences with the Judge (G. Mellan Faircloth) that the trial and sentences would be pretty much cut and dried. Some of us pleaded guilty, some non-guilty with stipulations, and one went to trial. I pleaded guilty, because I was guilty and said so. I was allowed to give a statement which I will post on this blog. My sentence was a $500.00 fine and 30 days in prison. As a care-giver for my elderly mother I requested probation. The Judge didn't care much about my situatuion. The other defendants received similar sentences.

To be truthful, I'm glad I got prison time. It's about the only way I can show how strongly I feel about human rights abuses practiced by our government. It's time that regular, normal people like myself stand up to the big powers that be and say, ENOUGH!!!! And my time is now.

And so the waiting begins again. Actually, I'm becoming pretty good at it... Just to let everyone know that I will be back in Columbus in November, to continue demonstrating and working to stop the funding for this school. Please think of me in prison by writing to your congress-person demanding that their vote will be to eliminate this "teaching torture" institution.

Pax Tecum

WAITING

2007-12-28T08:09:00.000-08:00

It has been over a month since my arrest at Fort Benning. I had lots to do with the busyness of Christmas, but still moments of anxiety and sheer fear about going to prison hit me. Nagging doubts about my strength to see this through, and the waiting, waiting, waiting.

Christmas was wonderful. All the family and friends together. I had Christmas greetings from old friends who remain so supportive after all these years. My new friend, Diane, who was arrested with me and my mentor, Sister Sheila in Florida, who was arrested last year have been a big positive part of this waiting time. Both have added depth and perspective to the act and action I am now a part of. Besides trying to make this time a learning experience about SOA/WHINSEC for people around me, I am constantly more aware of the joy of freedom, in making choices, of options, of movement, and of living the moment my way.

Even though I feel weak and frightened, and look at myself as "scared as a chicken", I remember the poem by Teddy Roosevelt, and I feel better.

It is not the critic who counts, not the man who points out
how the strong man stumbles or where the doer of deeds could have done better.
The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena
whose face is marred by dust and threat and blood
who strived valiantly, however errs and comes short again and again.
Who knows great enthusiasm, great devotions,
the triumph of high achievement and who, at worst, if he fails
at least fails while bearing greatly, so that his place shall never be
with those cold and timid souls who know neither victory or defeat.

And with those thoughts in my head, I continue to wait. My trial will be on Jan. 28, 2008 in Columbus, Georgia. Pax Tecum

CROSSING THE LINE

2007-11-23T07:50:00.000-08:00

While attending the demonstration to close the SOA at Fort Benning in Columbus, Georgia the week-end before Thanksgiving, after a year of prayer and discernment, I joined ten other activists and "crossed the line".

We were arrested and charged with federal criminal trespass on a military reservation in connection with an act of nonviolent civil disobedience. Since 1990, 226 activists have spent 95 years in prison as a result of nonviolent direct action to close the SOA/WHINSEC. They have put their bodies and freedom at risk in an act of solidarity toward victims and survivors of human rights abuses and those who are forced to live under SOA/WHINSEC sponsored violence on a day to day basis.

My trial will be on Jan. 28, 2008 in Columbus, Georgia. I will be sentenced to federal prison time. I ask for your prayers.

You can read about the School of the America's/WHINSEC in detail on the SOAW website. Their link is on this blogsite. They are a school the Pentagon funds with taxes we pay. They train soldiers from Latin American countries to torture, kill, and victimize their own people in an attempt to keep their countries unstable, allowing the U.S. and their corporate partners to control valuable resources such as the oil rich areas of South America.

Ugly? You bet. The government likes to keep the program as quiet as possible, and that's why you have probably never heard of it. But the word is getting around. There have been thousands of demonstrators at Fort Benning since 1990 demanding the school's closure, and one of these days, it will happen. If I can help make that happen, it will be well worth the fact that I'm soon to become a "prisoner of conscience".

Pax Tecum

OF THIS AND THAT

2007-10-30T09:14:00.000-07:00

Since my retirement one of my projects is to re-read some of the classics I read while in college. I just finished REPORT TO GRECO by Nikos Kazantzakis. What a gift that book is. He writes of his tumultuous life "wrestling with God" and when talking with his friend, Zorba speaks of the universe following a "divine rhythm. Seeds in the ground, birds, stars,--all obey. Only man lifts his hand in rebellion and wants to trangress the law and convert obedience into freedom. This is why he alone of all God's creatures is able to sin. To sin--what does that mean? It means to destroy harmony." I think the world is full of sinners today.

I travelled to Torrington (a town in southeastern Wyoming) to visit Heartland Biocomposites (http://www.heartlandbio.com/) where they re-cycle plastics to make fencing which is stronger then wood and has a lifetime warrenty. What a neat thing! We would like to start a recycling project here in Casper to supply Heartland with the plastic they use, and are doing the research to get that done.

I attended a book signing at Casper College over the week-end. The author is Lynne Cheney, the wife of the vice-president. The book title is BLUE SKIES, NO FENCES. It is about her life growing up in Casper in the 40's and 50's. I was one year behind her in school and our lives are similar in that regard. I remember Dick and Lynne in high school. Dick was Darth Vador even back then, quiet, surrounded by his group, not reaching out much and powerful behind the scenes. Lynne was always friendly and felt comfortable talking to everyone. I went, feeling I was at a conservative love fest, mainly because I love Wyoming history. Her book brought back many memories of a simpler time. All of us are connected, even if we don't much want to acknowledege it.

Pax Tecum

October

2007-10-15T07:21:00.000-07:00

If you ever wondered what Fall is all about, (you in Houston or Phoenix might question it), you need to be in Wyoming now. This morning the sun looks crisp, frost covers the roofs of houses, and the mountain sends her message: get ready, things are about to change in a big way. I love October. It's a transitional month, taking our hand, leading us from the heat of summer into the stark coldness of Winter. I love Wyoming. This beautiful place where nature speaks to you in the warmth of the sun, in vivid colors, in falling leaves, and in crisp fall mornings. You know that days ahead of searing cold winds and blowing snow and harsh sunlight will be here all to soon.

This special place speaks to us and prepares us for what's ahead. It's comforting to know that despite the hard winters, nature is predictable in the changing of the seasons. We know what's coming, so button down the hatches, stock-pile the pellets and get ready! Were that man made situations could be as comforting. Issues of our making such as war, injustice, poverty and the many other problems we perpetuate change in a heart-beat without warning or preparation.

Why can't we take a lesson from the seasons?

Pax Tecum

TIME LAPSE

2007-09-24T06:20:00.000-07:00

There is a wonderful poem I have treasured since college days. It was written by Mary Jean Irion. I want to share it with you.

"Normal day, let me be aware of the treasure you are. Let me learn from you, love you, savor you, bless you, before you depart. Let me not pass you by in quest of some rare and perfect tomorrow. Let me hold you while I may, for it will not always be so. One day I shall dig my fingers into the earth, or bury my face in the pillow, or stretch myself taut, or raise my hands to the sky, and want more than all the world your return."

Our lives were suspended from the middle of August until the middle of Sept. My husband's sister, Cathy, developed a massive infection and literally fought to her death. She existed in ICU units in two cities for a month. Spending a month in ICU as an observer is an education in itself. The heros were family members who found out they could become advocates, effective and vocal, for their loved one. And nurses. I am one. But the profession I spent 40 years in reinforced my commitment to it. They were strong advocates for patients unable to speak for themselves.

But more important than all of that was the dignity of the human spirit. We, who were allowed to be present to the most important journey Cathy ever made, marvelled at her strength, at her presence in the moment, and her final total acceptance. I am not the same person I was last month. My gift in that time lapse was the stark reality of that glorious normal day!

Pax Tecum

CRAP

2007-08-29T07:20:00.000-07:00

Camus: "I should like to be able to love my country and still love justice." Is that possible? I just completed reading a book entitled BROTHERS by David Talbot. It's about the Kennedy years. I'm old enough to remember the impact they had, and the heartbreak I felt when they were both murdered.

And I think most Americans realized that the Warren Commission findings were just a bunch of CRAP. We knew then and have always known they both died of a conspiracy. They were killed by forces in their own government. Pretty sad, huh? And here we are 40 years later, still unable to get the straight facts about their deaths from that same government, which by the way, is our government, in essence is US.

I thank David Talbot and people like him who think it's important to keep this story alive. Personally I remember that the Kennedys put the spark of passion for public service in me. As a result I trained for the Peace Corps, and worked the the public sector for 40 years as a public health nurse. To this day, I am active politically and work for social justice causes.

I am sad that my children did not get to know their passion, or understand their vision of a just world where peace is more important then war, and governments can be noble. I worry about who their role models will be, and if justice will be a priority in their lives.

CAMUS: "I should like to be able to love my country and still love justice."

Pax Tecum

YO, ALBERTSON'S !!!

2007-07-30T07:29:00.000-07:00

The word "green" used to be all about St. Patrick's Day. It has more meaning these days, and rightfully so. Combating climate change and gaining "energy security" often has me wondering what kinds of things I can be doing to help our old polluted earth.

I do most of my grocery shopping at Albertson's. It's close to my home and is smaller then the big box stores I get lost in. Going there this week led me to a great discovery. 10 sturdy canvas green bags for sale for 10 bucks. I bought three and carried my groceries home in green bags I will use again and again. Congratuations and thank you Albertson's! You are doing something to stimulate responsibility, and I'm responding!

Plastic bags have bothered me for some time. Did you know there is enough petroleum in 14 bags to drive a car one mile? It takes 12 million barrels of oil and 14 million trees to make all the paper and plastic bags Americans use each year.

A plastic bag needs 1,000 (yes, that's 1,000) years to decompose, according to the EPA. while a paper bag takes a month. Yet, paper bags generate more pollutants in production than plastic counterparts. Reuseable cloth bags solve the problem.

I applaud my daughter's friend, Adam, for completing plans on building a "green" house. Talk about being environmentally conscious!! As for me, I'm taking baby steps. Today, green bags, and light bulbs. Tomorrow, hopefully more. And how about you? Are you in the loop?

Remember to care and be aware...........Pax Tecum

Difficult Discernment

2007-07-14T08:17:00.000-07:00

I consider myself a peace activist, but it is a hard road to travel. Where to go, what to do, when to do it. How involved to get, not only with your money and your mind, but all out acts of civil disobedience.

Discern, by dictionary, means to perceive by the sight or the intellect, or to distinguish mentally. The decision to attend demonstrations, to be visable and vocal is fairly easy for me to do. I am good as part of the crowd, one of many making up the whole. I find it a very effective way of getting the message out, one of many, who understands the power in numbers.

But individual acts of civil disobedience puts you into the arena alone. The stakes are definitely higher, and the reasons for doing it must be clear in your head. This is heavy stuff, involving arrest, confinement, and notoriety. Why in the heck am I even talking about this???

I will tell you why. House Bill # 1707 was defeated again this year by a few votes. The bill was written to eliminate funding for the SOA/WHINSEC. That notorious combat training facility for Latin American security personnel located ar Fort Benning , Georgia. It is a school of torture and failed U.S. policy, and you and I are paying for it with our taxes.

Every year in November, at the gates of Fort Benning, thousands of the little people who value justice gather to demonstrate against the schools human right abuses. I've been there and demonstrated, and am now discerning if the time has come for me to do more.

It's hard when family and friends think you're crazy for even considering it. One member of my family stated "why in the world would you do that? It wouldn't make a bit of difference, and it sure would not change a thing". I think of the solidarity that would unite me with all the people who died and whose families were torn apart by this program. Am I crazy? Maybe.

I remember something Robert F. Kennedy said, and I think it addresses the little people like me. "Few will have the greatness to change history itself, but each of us can work to change a small portion of events, and in the total of all those acts will be written the history of this generation."

Pax Tecum

Women in Black

2007-06-07T09:17:00.000-07:00

Women in Black is an international movement of women for peace. It began in Jerusalem in 1988. It is a movement of women who hold silent vigils across the planet. They stand dressed in black to honor those who have experienced the devastation and tragedy of violence. This simple action is a unifying commitment to justice and a world free of violence.

It is an opportunity to participate in promoting peace within your sphere of influence: your heart, your home, your workplace, your community. By cultivating peace in our own lives, we can change the world, leaving a legacy for those that follow.

In Casper, Wyoming Women in Black meet on the first Wednesday of the month (rain or shine, blowing wind, or deep snow) . We stand in silence in front of the County Court House from noon to 1:00. We stand in solidarity with each other for peace, and create an awareness and energy for all who pass by, reminding them that peace is the ONLY answer.

Pax tecum

Memorial Day, 2007

2007-05-28T11:02:00.000-07:00

This Memorial Day in Casper, Wy. is a beautiful day. Perhaps summer is coming to stay awhile. It's time for kicking back and cooking outside and reflecting a bit on the ways and the whys of our lives. My oldest daughter, Tara and her friend, (my friend too) are running the Boulder-Boulder today, so I wish them well, and hope they improve their times considerably! Middle daughter, Katie spent the last couple of days in the Jackson Hole area, right in the heart of true Heaven country! And youngest daughter, Lisa has just moved back to Casper from Billings. We (hubby Tom and I) went up to help her move. I thank her for doing it at this time, because the country between here and there is absolutely beautiful. Wild flowers abound and everything is so green. Please, let us take care of it forever! We truly felt a kinship with this gift of space on the trip.

After returning from the Washington Peace March, I came home to Casper, and we had a peace march here on Armed Services Day. About 50 people marched to the Veteran's Park where we found a number of angry veterans shouting at us and invading our space, telling us to get out of their park and calling us communist losers. It was a confrontation we had not expected and it was a little frightening. We kept our cool and walked slowly through the Park and marched back to our starting point. It was a stark reminder of the way this war has impacted all of us, and strong feelings about it are not only displayed in Washington, but in our very own neighborhoods too. Remember: War is not healthy, ever! Pax Tecum

Mother's Day in Washington

2007-05-22T17:21:00.000-07:00

These pictures show Roxie and me at the CodePink activities in Washington over the Mother's Day week-end. All I am saying, is give peace a chance.....

A Mothers Day Unlike Others

2007-05-22T06:57:00.000-07:00

Mother's Day was different this year. I was not with immediate family, didn't receive flowers, and didn't go out to dinner. Instead I opted to be in Washington,DC visiting the Pink House and the White House. I hung out in Lafayette Park and walked in the "mother of A March" through the streets of Washington to the Capitol. Cindy Sheehan led us. We numbered about 350 people strong, all of us committed to make a statement that war is not acceptable to mothers and is not healthy for our children and other living things.

I went because I had to. After all I have learned in the past year about the injustice in the world, I have become accountable to use my spirit and strength to protest the powers that are able to lead us into chaos. How does one person from Wyoming influence the world stage? One way is by putting yourself on the stage with other like-minded people and making noise so loud that it rattles the walls of the rooms the elected ones sit in. That is the way we become the deciders.

And so two people from Wyoming, Roxie and I, went to witness with other peace loving men and women, the power of the people. The women we met were focused and extremely courageous. Many were arrested for civil disobedience, willing to face jail to nail home their message: End This War Now! And a mother's plea: WAR, NEVER AGAIN!!!

Our trip was possible because of the wind beneath our wings. Our families, Gene David"s hospitality in Baltimore, our friends who were unable to go themselves but encouraged us, and prayers that were felt throughout the entire experience. Thanks to you all. Pax Tecum

Into the Second Week

2007-05-07T19:44:00.000-07:00

The second week of retirement has started. It's strange to think I won't go to work tomorrow or the next day or the day after that. I'm trying to get used to the freedom but must admit I am a little scattered.
Peace and justice? You bet. This past week-end was spent at the Come and See Conference that the Diocese of Cheyenne sponsors every spring, and this year discussions focused on social justice. There were many fine speakers, but I especially enjoyed Sister Helen Prejean's talk entitled "Dead Man Walking--The Journey Continues" She told us her story about her journey that took her into the heart of prison ministry and how that led to a national dialogue about the death penalty. Where she started out is not where she ended up. The lesson in that? She advised that we must be acutely attuned to the sneakiness of God. Amen to that! The Universe has great plans for all of us, only they may not be our plans!
This week will bring more activity. I (along with Rox, my friend) will travel to Washington D.C. in solidarity with all mothers. We will demonstrate against the War and be witnesses that War in any form is not healthy for children or other living things. Pax tecum

2006 School of the Americas Demonstration

2007-04-29T12:49:00.000-07:00

This is the Wyoming delegation to the School of the Americas demonstation in Columbus, Georgia At Fort Benning, November, 2006. I am on the left of the picture with my black peace cap on.

The first day of the rest of my life

2007-04-29T12:29:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was my retirement party, after 40 years of working. Now I'm jumping off the cliff into a new realm. Join me as I explore the hard core realism of justice or lack of in this ever living moment. Ready???